I wanted to physically stand out and
the cost and consequences just seemed unimportant. My motto was “Live for today” and don’t worry
about tomorrow, right? That’s why my
plastic cards were so much fun! The more the merrier and just spread the good
cheer I thought. I never thought I would end up with a huge stack of bills I
couldn’t pay! Duh!!! Life was good and I was living it like a true princess.
Wiser professionals have called my behavior “shopaholic.” I could literally shop until I dropped!
My detour into fantasy land had some
painful outcomes. My spending was way out of control. I thought budget was a
nasty word only meant for accountants. Who needed that dull and boring life I
thought! Who wants to be a bean counter anyway? Didn’t I feel truly significant
wearing all my brand name clothes??? How insecure was I to think my worth was
only attached to expensive clothes??? I had a serious insecurity issue!
I had been rapidly feeding my
shopaholic habit for years without a break. I was getting an adrenaline rush
off of spending more and the addiction kept me satisfied until my next craving for more rose up and I needed to
go shopping again! There was no end to my appetite
for more. It reminds me of a clip
from the movie “Confessions of a Shopaholic” when Rebecca Bloomwood a true
shopaholic said “a store always smells good. A store can awaken a lust for things you never even knew you
needed.” In another classic line Rebecca says, “When I shop, the world gets
better and the world is better, but then it’s not, and I need to do it again.”
Now I remember why I didn’t like math
in school with so many rules and many more problems to solve. I had locked
myself in one gigantic financial mess by the time I needed help. Duh!!! Doing a
budget reminded me of doing another boring math problem. Yuck!!!
God woke me up one day out of my
fantasy coma and I realized that if I continued down this cancerous trail my
quality of life would look like a train wreck! I was so stressed out I knew my
health would be deteriorating and I would be enslaved to debtors. Wasn’t I
getting worried about how to juggle so much debt??? I could so relate to the
feelings of Rebecca Bloomwood who said in her movie “They said I was a valued
customer. Now they send me hate mail.”
Fortunately God intervened in my
desperate financial situation. God provided me an enthusiastic, Godly, wise and
witty budget counselor. Yea God!!! God knew I needed a special person to keep
my attention and encourage me to make the next right decision.
I had to learn lot of new financial
lessons. I learned I couldn’t spend more than I earned. That was huge for me to start off with.
Duh!!! I had to learn plastic cards were meant only for emergencies and had to
be paid off monthly or I couldn’t use them. I had to learn I had to pay God
first (10% of my income=tithe), my bills second and then save some. Once my
budget came out of the red I could give some $ away. I had to learn to list my
expenses and make sure I could cover them. I had to learn to list them on a
calendar and keep them in a stand up sorter by date due. I had to learn I would
have a better future if I saved some $ today. I had to learn my worth wasn’t
attached to my clothes. I had to learn to become skilled at coupons and be
proud of myself for saving money. Less is more. Less spending leaves more in my
pocket for a later date and emergencies. I had to learn to save because
emergencies come up that require extra $. I had to learn people were more
important than stuff. I am still learning and being challenged. My only regret
is that I didn’t become wiser at spending earlier in my life. You my friend can
benefit from my mistakes and take the wiser path.
You
can see your true value and identity is in Christ and know he is well pleased
with your good stewardship!
Today is a great day for a do over.
Treat yourself! After all you are entitled to a better life….God’s style and
not yours.
P.S. I no longer feel significant with fancy stuff
but my new significance is with my Savior.
“Let
no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another.”
Romans 13:8
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